A Tale of Freeloaders

Ruchira tells us about freeloaders, who happily parasite on others. A tongue-in-cheek piece, replete with humour. An exclusive for Different Truths.

You see them all around you, day in and day out. They abound in your neighbourhood, offices, on the regular bus or metro taking you to and from work and so forth. It’s not that they are poor or needy, rather it is just a habit that has sort of grown on them. And they appear to be blissfully unaware of this phenomenon. I have come across a huge number of such people familiarly hailed as freeloaders.

Mr. Saxena, a superannuate from the railways, who lives in the same housing estate as we do, seldom spends money on commuting to nearby places. He stands at the main gate of the society each morning ready to pounce on nearly every car or two-wheeler that leaves the premises, and smoothly manages to hitch a ride. I guess people do not refuse since he’s an octogenarian. Age comes in handy for the gentleman!

I recall how Alpana (all names changed), one of my former colleagues would invariably polish off my subji (if we happened to lunch together) without sparing a thought as to how I would consume my rotis. She would bring only plain parathas and raita for herself, without fail.

Twinkle, who used to drive down to our Noida office from Meerut was smarter. Whenever she saw me sampling my favourite stuffed aloo parathas, she would seat herself at my table and begin to chat. Out of sheer courtesy, I would invite her to a bite; her bites comprised large slices and in no time my plate would be empty. She neither noticed nor ordered a refill…it was always that way.

Penchant for Pakoras

Atifa, an anchor-cum-moderator on our television channel displayed a penchant for pakoras. I remember how many times she swooped down on my frugal plate of pakoras in the office canteen and left me gaping. Certainly, she earned enough to buy herself (and me) pakoras!  But did she? Nah! Never.

Freeloaders are to be found in higher echelons of society too. Another colleague of mine – daughter of a veteran politician – used to be a freeloader. Be it a press conference, book launch or an inauguration, she would make a beeline to the service area at the earliest possible opportunity and help herself to food and beverages in humongous quantities.

At one such event, while she was gleefully helping herself to the refreshments, she was accosted by some of the organizers, who discovered that she had gatecrashed and was consequently asked to put down her plate! Incidentally her spouse is a business tycoon and her brother-in-law a well-known couturier. So much for affluence and sophistication.

My late father would humorously narrate how his packets of biscuits/crackers meant for tea- breaks, while at work were more often than not emptied by colleagues. To knock some sense into them, dad resorted to jokingly asking them to take turns and order munchies for everyone. Some did, others couldn’t care less.

A Freeloader Kin

A distant relative of mine (on the maternal side) certainly takes the cake when it comes to freeloading. Many times we get invited to the same gatherings or parties. Honestly it gets tad embarrassing for us to witness how she hangs around the kitchens of the myriad hosts, greedily sampling piping hot dishes even before they are carried to the dining/serving area.

Believe it or not, on a couple of occasions she was seen purloining sweetmeats despite having been served a plateful, a short while earlier. Considering the rate at which she gorges on the delicacies she ought to carry lavish gifts for the hosts, in sync with the specific occasion. However, when it comes to gifts (she has a family pension anyway) she glibly latches on to her sons, terming it as a family combo.

One can overlook such behaviour on the part of children or teenagers but a 70-year-old acting in this manner, well really…

Visuals by Different Truths