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An intense love poem, by Lipsa, in the Vaishnava tradition, exclusively for Different Truths.
Because I cannot unsee or foresee
Because I’m throbbing between Thine and Thee
Because I’ve known you without knowing you
I sit by Yamuna, at the mouth of dusty streets,
Being man in woman
Being ghoul and human
And count the hours I keep
Between waking and sleep.
The days rolled into a ball
Come to me from the banqueting hall
Rolling over me, crashing into me;
A question rolls through the evening stalls
Toppling me into your endless sea
Spreading me through your endless sea
Drowning out their calls
Life is very long
Longer the pain of longing
Now that my dreams can no longer recover you
Though I have been to the graveyards of Xanadu,
Played on her dulcimer her ancient song
Through the warm sun and the cold night
And the shadow between the two.
You dream, you dream
I hear you scream
My name
Over the temperate stream
Stomach sunk,
Shrunken arms and legs
Sprawl over the sinful bed,
Bent head
For my eyes only
Because I am all
You are small, fall –
Lie under primal canopy.
Lord, I am for your eyes only
Though the colonnade has collapsed
And the idols are crumbling
Rumbling, grumbling
Stumbling, falling
The heart empty, the bed lonely
Stumbling, stumbling
The hours empty, the landscape lonely.
Because I have seen and cannot see
Because I throb between you and me
Because I know without knowing
You descend onto me
Rising, throbbing
Wrought in the ancient flame
Once upon a dream, a fine frame
Gained by giving
Born in dying
Known in forgetting:
Lord, you are unending,
Said the maidens singing.
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