A heart-wrenching poem of lost love, of a marriage failing after 22 years. The agony of separation has been poignantly portrayed by Elsy in this verse, for Different Truths.
That morn, Leann, when
you turned your back on
my heart as well the front door
in a vein that casual,
I stood agape in agony,
with ashen agitation!
Did we really know each other,
did you know me, and I, you?
We lived under vows
for years two and twenty,
the house still pulsates
with the pranks of our progeny.
Were we on parallel tracks,
or flowing along like oil and water?
Did you understand me ever,
or did you never?
Understanding is one thing
not understanding, another
but misunderstanding
is a voiceless killer!
Misreading has wrenched
many a heart apart! 
The note you left behind
for me to fathom you,
plumbed me out too,
a bit belated though.
You have regretted
that I was unromantic,
but then what is romance?
True, I never did volubly
vocalise my love,
as for me the feel of love
Is divine, not delivered.
I was not born silver-tongued,
a congenital flaw!
But could you not sense
the solidity of my love?
You have groused that I kept
you, like a chick, under my wings.
True, you were my homing pigeon,
that I always craved to shield.
You have lamented that I failed
to feel your feelings
and sense your sensitivity,
but was that not reciprocal?
Wasn’t my shoulder
there for you to cry on
in moments forlorn?
Do you have a shoulder now
to lean on, when downcast?
I know you did not leave me
for another, but to discover yourself.
You could have done it here
casting off your reticence.
Reticence is the scourge of amity.
Dialogue deep from hearts
deepen the bonds of souls.
Dammed up ego
makes ease forego!
You were a cardiologist
and I, an architect.
But you could not read
my heart alright,
though you set
numerous hearts right.
I built strong edifices
that soared skywards
but the edifice of my life
sank floor wards!
Sheer irony knew not
the mansion was shaky
till you chose to evacuate!
Six moons are past
since you walked past
my lone reeling heart
steeping it in angst.
My will is not ill
but my heart is in ache.
Well or ill, Leann,
I forever leave the gateway
of my heart open, for you
to step in and close it from within.
Till then will I wait
nursing my heart
and feeding my hope.
Make not that moment go past
the moment I breathe last!
©Elsy Satheesan
Photos from the internet.
#Poem #Pain #Separation #FailedMarraige #Life #Lament #LoveLost #DifferentTruths
Elsy Satheesan is a retired Professor of English. She had been teaching in colleges under the Govt. of Kerala, India. Currently, she resides in Virginia, USA. ‘Random Musings’ is her first volume of poems. ‘Summer Snow’, is the forthcoming one. Her poems have been published in national and international anthologies. Short stories in Malayalam have been published in weekly and fortnightly, in Kerala. Humanity is her religion, and poetry, her passion.
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