An evocative poem by Dr. Roopali about Pitrapaksha, when we pray, cook, and feed our ancestors, the patriarch’s ghosts that visit us, every year. The women-ghost perhaps are still neglected. An exclusive for Different Truths.

These quiet prayerful days when to
light an oil lamp to walk inside memory 
lane beside those who passed 
over the rainbow
a long time ago.
 
A time to know 
the bones and the muscles 
which are yours now 
were theirs too.
 
That smile, the twinkle 
in the baby’s eyes
seem like the fading 
sepia photograph framed 
on a neglected damp wall.
 
This time of the year when 
the sun’s rays slant away 
and the torrential monsoons go away 
they say, our ancestors visit us.
 
These are those days when
ghosts walk about 
casually dropping in just 
when its dinner time. 
 
Or you may see one under 
the tall mango tree. 
The one who had so lovingly 
planted the mango seed 
whose sweetness you had sucked.
 
Most times the ghost ancestors are men...
fathers, grandfathers, their fathers 
and sometimes that bachelor uncle 
who romanced the village girls. 
Stories abound of war, 
bullets and bravery. 
 
Of the Yeti on the mountainside 
his lock of hair's still preserved.
 
Feasted and feted in their lifetime 
these extraordinary men 
are just a ghost of themselves. 
 
Hungering and longing for earthly food. 
Curried chicken or mutton roasted on a spit. 
A sweet and sour pumpkin with puris fried in oil. 
Rice boiled slowly in milk for hours 
with jaggery and nuts
all pitaji’s favourite. 
 
A patriarchal ghost indeed. 
He will watch in ghostly silence 
as the raggedy poor will eat.
 
And Mother? What should we cook for her? 
Ask the girls they were always with her. 
Her helping hands till soldiers in uniform 
came on horses and took them 
away to bear their sons. 
 
Amma? What did she like to eat? 
Who? Amma? Frail Amma.
No one seemed to know. 
She ate after her husband 
and the children had eaten, they said. 
 
Whatever little remained. 
Sometimes nothing at all. 
Perhaps just a cup of tea? 

Visual by Different Truths

Dr. Roopali Sircar Gaur

Dr. Roopali Sircar Gaur is a poet, travel writer, and social justice activist. A former professor of English Literature at Delhi University, and a creative writing professor at IGNOU, she is a widely published academic and creative writer. Her book Twice Colonised: Women in African Literature, is a seminal text on women’s socio-political empowerment. In 2020-21, she co-edited two poetry anthologies – In All the Spaces: Diverse Voices in Global Women’s Poetry, and Earth Fire Water Wind.