Soumya reminisces the life and times of his grandfather, a Rai Bahadur, where eating was a ritual with elaborate meals. He remembers his occasional lavish meals too, where he is asked to watch his girth and calories. An exclusive for Different Truths.

My grandfather, whom I called Dadu, was a British Civil servant with the title Rai Bahadur, who spent all his service years suited booted and having his meals with a knife and fork on dining tables. This I have not witnessed but heard from the older aunts and grandmother.

But immediately on his retirement, shortly after the independence of India, he turned a Bengali with a vengeance.

He wore only crisp dhoti kurtas and had traditional Bengali meals sitting on the floor on an elaborate asan, or a woven mat of silk, in copper utensils in conventional design.

The meal was highly elaborate, with the plate having a steaming cone of rice surrounded by savouries and a host of smaller vessels surrounding the plate, each with a different item.

The room was a large hall with Ravi Verma paintings and family portraits on the walls. My grandmother, also the daughter of a Civil Servant and Rai Bahadur, who was educated in a convent by European ladies, sat in front, watching him eat and urging him to try this or that, while the person serving hovered around just outside waiting for summons for second helpings.

Whenever we were staying over at his place, I would also sit next to him with a smaller plate.

The men were usually at work, and the ladies ate after we finished.

Dadu ate only a small part of the elaborate meal and finished it by drinking a bowl of milk.

The leftover food was eaten by the help, which shocked me even then, but not the beneficiaries or others in the household.

On the rare occasions when my father was there, he took only a little and finished everything he taught me.

All these traditions were discontinued after he passed away

 Nowadays, we sometimes have these elaborate meals in fine dining in Bengali restaurants on special occasions. Still, the plates are not the same, and no grandmother is sitting in front urging us to eat more, but the LOH and kids are commenting on the calorie count and my girth and cautioning me to eat less.

Picture design by Anumita Roy, Different Truths

Soumya Mukherjee

Soumya Mukherjee is an alumnus of St Stephens College and Delhi School of Economics. He earns his daily bread by working for a PSU Insurance company, and lectures for peanuts. His other passions, family, friends, films, travel, food, trekking, wildlife, music, theater, and occasionally, writing. He has been published in many national newspapers of repute. He has published his first novel, Memories, a novella, hopefully, the first of his many books. He blogs as well.

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