Dr Ritu, writing for DifferentTruths.com, reflects on the silent voyeurism of social media and the urgent need for genuine connection.

The other day, my children suggested that I should post my writings on my WhatsApp status so they could reach more people. I’m not very tech-savvy and usually shirk from using social media to showcase my work. But somehow, I got caught in the trap and uploaded a picture of my recently published story in a magazine.

After an hour or so, I had the impulse to check the outcome. I noticed many people—whose numbers I had saved—had seen the story. The lure was natural. We humans are like that by temperament. Who doesn’t want a name and fame? Encouraged, I posted another write-up, published in a newspaper, on my status a few days later. Voilà! I had a revelation.

People whose numbers I had saved once, purely for professional urgency—with whom I had little familiarity—the shopkeepers from whom I buy groceries, the acquaintances I had met only once for some college work, or those who deliberately keep their distance and show no interest in my work—all of them had stopped by to have a peep at my status. And yet, not many of them bothered to appreciate or send even an emoji to acknowledge their presence in my story.

It was as if I had become a silent performer on a stage with a full house, yet no applause.

This made me realise how easily we slip into others’ lives—silently, uninvited—without a word or a gesture. We don’t show concern when our paths cross. We don’t bother to make a courtesy call. Silently, we enter people’s lives and form our own perceptions about them and their work. It’s a human phenomenon—but isn’t it ethically wrong to do so?

Then again, who thinks about ethics in today’s world? A world where values have gone topsy-turvy, where we often get distracted by gossip and instant pleasure, forgetting the deeper connections. We play games smeared with prejudice, in egoistic jungles, trying to emerge victorious in misplaced battles.

We scroll endlessly, double-tap images, and forward reels, yet hesitate to offer a kind word to someone within reach.

We all need hugs and healing—a pause from the hunt to satisfy our egos, our false pride, and our chained minds. The act of sharing my work on my status brought me no joy. Instead, it made me ponder: why are we so reluctant to share our opinions honestly with one another? Sharing means caring.

We want to know what’s happening next door. If everything seems calm, we peep in even more—wondering, is this the peace before a storm? And if, God forbid, that peace is disrupted, we pat ourselves on the back and smile knowingly—without once thinking of reaching out, without checking if the person has slipped or slid.

Life is a roller coaster, a ride on sledges and sleighs for everyone. We’re all on skateboards, whooshing toward eternity.

Then why not reach out to one another? Applaud someone’s applaudable work. Support someone in distress.

The statuses we so slyly keep track of—how do they really affect our lives? If they do, we must interact.

If they don’t, and we only use them to get an update on someone else’s life, we need to pause and ponder. Think twice before we “peek-a-boo”.

The one whose status we watch may just laugh at our childlike curiosity. Or they may feel hurt and watched but never acknowledged. Aren’t we lost in understanding? Just looking, but never quite landing.

We chase the status but avoid the face—the face that might show us the truest place. We’ve become maps with no directions, ink smeared into reflections. Now tell me—do you see the question or the answer in the reflection?

Picture design by Anumita Roy

Dr Ritu Kamra Kumar

Dr Ritu Kamra Kumar is an acclaimed academic, poet, and writer with over 400 publications in national media. A retired Principal and English Professor, she has authored eight books and 70+ research papers. Recognised as an “Empowered Woman” by The Hindustan Times, she is an Indian Woman Achiever Award recipient. A sought-after speaker and workshop leader, her extensive contributions to literature and education earned her prestigious honours from the District Administration and Delhi Book Fair.